Friday, September 26, 2008

Nothing, Something, and an Email Update.

If anyone read my "please help me" blog and didn't comment - SHAME ON YOU! Just kidding...

But now I have to explain someone. That is - James.

Before I go any further, I want to point out a new feature on my blog. I owe the idea to...well...whoever came up with it. But I owe COMPLETION of the idea to both Anna and James who commented on my last post. Of course, James was just being sarcastic. I'll bet he didn't even know he was saying something helpful. But, thanks to Anna letting me know that I could get the code for enabling E-Mail subscriptions to my blog. Now if you look in the upper right hand corner (go ahead and look now) you can type in your email address and get updates to my blog! Anna, I'll see what I can come up with for your blogging ideas, but for now, I have to continue with my verbal thrashing of one of my best friends from high school.

Depending on how you know me, you might already know who James is. If you don't know who he is then before I go on this tirade about his comment on my "please help me" post (link above if you haven't seen it), I want to make it clear that this is a friendly tirade. It's typical of our sense of humor and friendship and now that I know he's visited my site, "it's on!"

All seriousness aside, James is one of the most fluent sarcasm masters I know. And by masters, I mean that was even his major in college and he got his masters in sarcasm. But I guess that's needed in order to teach! That's what he does...he teaches. And I know he had to hone his sarcasm skills in order to teach because I remember the teachers WE had!

James commented that I should continue to blog about having nothing to blog about. Sorry, James. That idea was already used in television. I think it was called "Seinfeld" and you can now catch it in syndication.

He also commented that when he looked at his reader it would tell him that that there was a new blog post about not having anything to blog about. I'm pretty certain that this "reader" is one of his students. James can't read. He has someone he picks out to do his reading for him.

His comment about emailing people when there's new information on my the feed from my blog was intended to be completely sarcastic (trust me, I know him), but little did he know that I can actually do that! And now I have. James, have one of your students put their email address in there so they can let you know when there's more "nothing" on my blog.

He also mentioned using text messages to update people when there's an email about there being a feed about there being more on my blog. This was just a defense mechanism trying to not let on that he can't read. That was actually code for "You should call me when you have a new post! But if it's after school hours, you'll have to read it to me!"

The fact that he mentioned Morse Code is just a fa├žade. It's a fluke he actually mentioned a legitimate, albeit antiquated, method of communication.

Ok - I think I'm done for now.

James, thanks for letting me bully you on my blog. Although you may not have seen it coming, I'm sure you'll take it in stride. In fact, you might even have one of your students type up a blog for you in vengeance!

I'm guessing his comments actually spawned from the fact that I posted a message on my facebook account saying that I had posted a blog looking for ideas on what to post. Hey! In my defense, I was trying to get the word out to the people that I know that I am looking for more ideas on what to blog about. I'm also looking for more exposure, so if you think you know someone who would enjoy my writing, feel free to pass along a link!

Bring on those ideas!

7 comments:

The Rock Chick said...

I subscribed!!!! Other ways I've learned to get people to your blog are to tag your posts with the words naked and/or Britney Spears. I haven't tired it, but a single tag of Britney Spears naked might work better than all conventional methods combined! LOL

Just keep writing. People will come. And if they don't, you have Crystal and The Rock Chick as regular readers, what else could anyone possibly need? :)

The Rock Chick said...

Oh, one more thing....respond to the comments you do get. That makes people come back and encourages interaction. It's a good thing!

Dustin said...

You know, Jessica, you're right! That's one thing that I've noticed about some of the more prolific bloggers...the respond to their commenters. An example I need to follow for sure.

I think one of the reasons I haven't thus far is that when I visit a blog post, I typically only visit once. When I think about it, I will check the "email follow up comments" box, so that if there is a response to something I've said, I'll know...but too often I forget.

Thanks for the tip!

James said...

Dear Mr. Harris,
I am sorry that it was so easy for you to figure out that I wrote the last entry and not my teacher, the one you call James. He has asked me to write to you again and I have agreed to, provided he gives me extra credit.
The first thing my teacher asked me to do was to use very small words so that you could easily understand everything that I wrote. He also asked me to include a link to a dictionary, so here you go: dictionary.reference.com. He said this would be helpful because it could pronounce any words that you were unfamiliar with (anything with more than two syllables).
My teacher wanted your readers to be aware that the rantings and ravings on the blog were most likely due to an issue that has plagued you for your entire life: multiple personalities.
He mentioned that you have had multiple personalities since you were very young; often times you would pretend that you were one of your friends. He said in eighth grade you got hit in the face by a volleyball and after that point would refer to yourself as "Jeff" or "James." Judging from your picture I am sorry to see that the wound has still not healed after all these years.
My teacher also told me that often times when you were young, you thought of yourself as different animals. He was able to find photos of you as a cow (http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41S96FWoy3L._SL500_AA280_.jpg), an ape (http://www.starstore.com/acatalog/Zira_figure_L.jpg), and a rabbit (http://buttonmashing.com/wp-content/uploads/bunny-suit.jpg).
I am glad to hear from my teacher that many doctors have tried to help you with these multiple personalities. He said that for a while they installed a tiny primate into your brain to help you make decisions (http://www.vfxhq.com/1997/stills/men/men-head1.gif). Unfortunately this creature went mad and had to be removed. Next, the doctors installed a totally electronic brain. Unfortunately, the operation was a failure because the brain was accidentally reprogrammed (sorry for the big word) by a chimp when the doctors weren't looking (http://www.socialfiction.org/img/memochimp.jpg). My teacher said that it was fortunate that no one ever noticed a change in your personality.
Well Mr. Harris I must go. I have enjoyed typing on your blog again. I hope my teacher will let me do this again sometime.
-Anonymous Student

Crystal said...

James, you have way too much time on your hands.

Wait. Did I marry the cow, the ape, or the rabbit?

Don't answer that.

Dustin said...

Oh my gosh! I laughed SO hard at James's comment! Or his student's comment. Or someone's comment. Maybe it was my comment? Am I one of James's students?

If so, Lord, Help me!

James said...

Dear Mr. Harris,
My teacher informed me that the last link in my previous post went bad. I am sorry that this happened. I contacted the doctors for my teacher and they were able to post a new image of the chimp on the web at the following address: http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2007/12/03/chimp460x276.jpg
Hopefully this one will work. (Although if more of them go bad, I will get more extra credit because I will have to write on your blog more!)
-Anonymous Student